5 Reasons why not to worry what others think of you!

Why do we let others have power over our lives and why do we find it so important what others think of us. The reason most likely is that we are being human. As human beings we are looking for positive confirmation from others about our image. This is really important to us and negative confirmation can even be damaging. We are checking our own self-image against the people around us, this is a natural process.

 It is when we start worrying too much about what others think of us that can have a negative impact, it can lead to anxiety and even health problems…

 

We all have worries…. But some worry more than others.

In itself worry is not bad, it puts us into action, but too much of it can lead to anxiety.

And what we know about anxiety is that it can have lasting impact on health and happiness…. Not something we want for ourselves, is it?
 

Everyone will recognise some or all of the following thoughts and you can probably think of many more:

-          Oh, I don’t know what to wear, people will think I look stupid….

-          She probably thinks I’m fat and totally unfit…

-          This is the 2nd time I’m in the shop today, they must think I’m forgetful…

-          All this weed, the neighbour must think I don’t care about the garden…

-          He must think I’m stupid…

-          My colleague must think I’m lazy…
-          I’m sure that my manager want to give me that opportunity…

 

It is natural that we worry about things like this, as after all we are human beings.

What we don’t want, is that these thoughts are influencing our life. That we start acting differently because of these thoughts….. So let’s have a look at why you should stop worrying to much about what others think and what it can bring to you.

 

5 reasons why not to worry…

• People don’t think about you as much as you probably think!

             It is a fact that people don’t think about you and as much as you may think.

Usually people think about what is closest to their hearts most of the time, they think about their children, partner or the job or family. And like you, they might have their heads full with thinking about what other people think of them.

 

• It’s nice to be liked by others, but the most important person to be liked by is you!

So, off course we are human beings and by nature we want to be liked by others… by every one!

Well, the chance that you are going to succeed at this is 0. And the question is, is it really important to be liked by everyone? Remember, the most important person to be liked by is you!

Easier said than done, but really why think negative about yourself if it makes you unhappy!
 

• It’s your thoughts… not theirs

It is important to understand that it’s your thoughts that are negative about you, not theirs. It’s your brain that is thinking whatever you are thinking that they are thinking. The good news is, you can learn to change your thoughts. Every time a negative thought comes up and you are aware of it, you replace it by something positive. This will be hard at first, but practice, practice, practice and after a while the positive thought might even come first!

 

• Are they really thinking that…? Have you ever asked?

Then there are these cases where it is still important to you what others think…. In these cases communication is key…. Instead of worrying what might happen or what others might think….. Go and ask. For example you don’t want the neighbours to become angry at you, because you were not aware of what noises go thru the walls…. Before you start worrying about things as… Is my television too loud, do I need to take of my shoes etc. …? Communicate, go over to your neighbours and simply ask. What do they currently hear and are they bothered about it? Case might be that they do not even notice… and if they do, well now you are in a conversation and you can work towards a mutual understanding.
 

• The power of positivity

Have you ever heard that, you can change your world by thinking positive? Well, it’s the truth…. Positive thoughts breed positive results… Don’t underestimate the power of your thoughts, they affect your life and those around you! So what will happen if you don’t worry about negative things that others might think about you, but you think positive about yourself and expect others to do the same! Actually you do need to do a little extra…. Not just think in this way, but truly believe it!

 

How to stop worrying…

• Think Positive!

As mentioned previously positive thoughts will bring positive things. Some people are natural positive thinkers, their cup is always half full. Is your cup half empty and are you thinking that others think negative about you… start replacing those negative thoughts by positive ones. Off course this will be hard work at first as your brain is used to the negative thoughts. But remember, these thoughts make you unhappy, keep on practicing positive thinking and you will start noticing the difference… 
 

• Love yourself!

You are definitely worth it! Overcome those negative thoughts about yourself. Ask yourself, is it really important to know what all these people are thinking? Straighten your back and think of all the positive things you bring to the world!  
 

• Be mindful!

Basically being mindful is a way of paying attention to the present moment. So how can that help? Being mindful helps become more aware of our thoughts and feelings so that instead of being overwhelmed by them, we’re better able to manage them.

Practising mindfulness can give people more insight into their emotions, boost their attention, concentration and can improve relationships.

 

I hope this gave some insight and maybe even some actions for you to take steps towards a more positive and worriless life. Good luck!